Welcome Author Shanna Groves to
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| ~at CrossRiver |
Sit, Wait, Trust: A
Writer-Mom’s Journey
By Shanna Groves
After two days of being holed up with a badly injured foot,
I lost it.
My husband had been taking care of our three young children
and household duties—things I should’ve
been doing. My heart pounded as my one-year-old son screamed when I yanked my
crutches away from him. “No,” I told him. “Hurt.” I felt lightheaded as my
eight-year-old son attempted to carry his baby brother up the stairs to their
bedroom. “Careful!” I pleaded with them. Then there was the stinky odor that
wouldn’t go away. I hobbled to the washing machine, and there they were—my
bathroom rug and toilet seat cover that sat in mildewed water for 48 hours.
My life pre-foot injury could have been summed up as “God is
in control—but only when I’m not.” As a micro-managing momma, I felt empowered
knowing that I had mine, my three kids’ and my husband’s lives under perfect
control. My husband was well-fed and encouraged. My children never had to worry
about hot breakfasts, clean underwear or how to get to school, because I was on
top of things. I even had my friends’ lives under control. Whenever they needed
me, I was there, doling out endless advice, prayers and relentless reassurances
of “You know I’m here for you.” People could depend on me for anything.
After tripping off a porch step and badly injuring my left
foot, I couldn’t walk. Neighbors and church friends fed my family; I couldn’t
maneuver well around the kitchen in crutches. My parents, who had driven from
out of state to help, made sure my older two children wore clean underwear and
socks to school. Friends took turns babysitting my one-year-old son because I
wasn’t able to carry him. My husband took a week off from work to do grocery
shopping, run errands and make sure all of us had a hot breakfast.
All the while, I sat on the sofa and wondered how I would
ever get back on top of things. I felt like I was riding a rollercoaster
without a seatbelt on; not being able to control things around my house. I knew
I had to give up my need to control things, but it was hard. I had to learn how
to be still, wait for things, depend on others, and earnestly pray for healing.
One day, my cell phone rang.
“What are you doing?” asked my very busy mom friend.
“Just hanging out,” I mumbled.
“How’s the foot?” Her voice competed with toddler squeals.
“Hey kids,” she called out. “Quit putting rocks on the dog’s head.”
“The foot’s still sore,” I said, “and I don’t know what to
do.”
“So, how are you?”
she asked. “Is your husband home now?”
“Yep, he’s here.”
“Well, that’s good.”
“It is?” I answered, smugly.
My friend giggled. Then I started giggling. The tension and
guilt rose from the pit of my stomach, to my chest, up my throat, and out my
mouth. I busted out laughing; I just lost it.
“You okay?” she asked me.
I continued laughing but attempted to answer. “I’m a
one-footed momma. I can’t do anything without
my husband right now!”
My insatiable need to do things without help—it had to stop.
I had to start trusting God as the Divine CEO of my home, family and life.
“Is there anything too hard for the Lord?” Moses wrote in
Genesis 18:14. Without God and the
helpers he provided during my recovery, there was no way me or my family
could’ve managed. I believe that is exactly what I needed to learn. To just sit
on that couch, give up my crazy need to control, and learn how to depend on him
completely.
After faithful prayers from family and church friends, my
foot healed and I was able to walk again less than a month after the injury.
But I will never forget the lesson God taught me—slow down and trust him.
~
How about you? Is this a lesson you've had to learn? Having chronic Lyme's disease, I can definitely empathize with Shanna on this issue. What lesson has God taught you recently? Leave a comment with your email if you'd like to be entered for a free e-book of Confessions of a Lip Reading Mom.
*To be entered into the drawing, please leave your email address in a comment which must be left before Monday. Please leave a space on each side of @ in your email address in order to help avoid spammers. Winner will be notified via email. Thank you! :D
*To be entered into the drawing, please leave your email address in a comment which must be left before Monday. Please leave a space on each side of @ in your email address in order to help avoid spammers. Winner will be notified via email. Thank you! :D
~
Shanna Groves now walks, not runs, to the next appointment.
She is learning patience at this very minute as she waits for the laundry load
to finish so she can throw it in the dryer. When the kids are in school, she
works as a writer. One of her books, Confessions of a Lip Reading Mom, will be
published any day now. Visit her at www.ShannaGroves.com.
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